Mommy tummy-and-head aches

While Shawn was in school, Lilly and I spent the gray and rainy morning at the DMV to renew my license. The woman verifying my information definitely fit the stereotype if the people who work at DMVs. My name, address, hair color, eye color, voter registration, willingness to be an organ donor - all the same. But, she gave me a doubtful look when she asked if my weight was accurate.

Gee.  Thanks.

I also had to take the  written test. ugh. (At least I didn't have to do the driving test!) It turned out not to be so bad. I was in and out in less than an hour! Now, I don't need to go back to that oh-so-joyful place until 2017, which is still too soon!

Since Lilly was born, people have been asking how Shawn's doing with her. He has been GREAT - with her! But he has occasionally been really difficult with Raj and me. Screaming. Hitting. Kicking. It doesn't happen often but any of it is too much!

Today was particularly bad. He had a full blown tantrum this morning almost as soon as he woke up. (This was after 12+ hours of sleep, so I don't think tiredness was an issue.) Later, he fell asleep immediately after school, so I thought he could start the day over when he woke up. The first five minutes when he woke up were great, but then he fell apart again and the rest of the afternoon was disastrous.

I got a break this evening because Lilly and I went to a Mothers & More board meeting. But, Raj walked into a war zone when he came home from work. As I was walking out the door, Shawn hit him  in the face!

What. A. Day.

(As I was buckling Lilly into her car seat to leave, Shawn came up to me with the sweetest look in his face and asked, "Can I come with you too? " WHAT?!? Are you kidding me?? NO!!)

The M&M meeting was the perfect break I needed. Other than needing to be fed when we first got there & then needing a diaper change a little while later, Lilly slept the whole time. She happily (sleepily) went from lap to lap of the other moms who needed a 'baby fix.' And, I had a jumbo chunk chocolate chip cookie for dinner. Life was starting to look better.

Lilly all girly-girled for her first Mothers and More meeting

Since we were at Starbucks, our meeting had to end at 10 o'clock, when they closed. We still hung around and chatted for a while, but eventually they kicked us out. Honestly, I was a little scared to come home and find out how the rest of the evening went with Shawn. When I did get home, Raj said that Shawn spent the first 20 minutes or so sitting and thinking in Time Out (much longer than typical sessions), but after that he was fine and the rest of the evening was calm and back to normal.  Thank goodness!

When I came upstairs to get ready for bed, a little voice from the darkness called out, "I didn't know you were home, Mom!" I handed Lilly to Raj, since he had not seen her all day, and ran into Shawn's room for goodnight hugs and kisses. My sweet little boy was back.

Since he had a very long nap after school earlier that afternoon, he was still wide awake. We took some time to chat about his evening with Daddy. He told me he wanted to get me my very own toolbox for my birthday, so we could all have our own sets. He told me that he and Daddy made mac 'n cheese with shell noodles. I explained to him how much I enjoyed snuggling and cuddling and talking with him like this, rather than how we spent the rest of the day together. I also told him that the problems we were having earlier made me feel badly and gave me tummy aches and headaches, but spending time together like this made me feel happy and I was warm and fuzzy inside. Even in the darkness I could see his big smile.

And magically,  the rest of the day was erased.

I've been prepared for Shawn to show some sort of regression since Lilly was born. A backslide in potty training, comments about giving Lilly back to the hospital (I have heard that is a common one), acting babyish - that kind of thing. But, he really has been great in all aspects related to her. I think he's very proud to be her big brother. Meanwhile, I have completely missed what he's actually doing. Days like this are probably his way of demanding attention. When he had Raj all to himself in the evening, he was fine. When we were chatting one on one in his bed, he was adorable.

So, I think I may have finally figured it out. (Something about not seeing the forest for the trees?)  I need to make more of an effort to give Shawn undivided attention. Duh!